No Thanks Lyonnais!

Transitive Properties of Youth
Self released

LyonnaisThere is an iconic – often recited (sometimes even correctly) scene in the 1987classic “Planes, Trains, and Automobiles.” Steve Martin tells John Candy, “Here’s a good idea – have a POINT. It makes it SO much more interesting for the listener!”

That is exactly what went though my mind as I listened to the blathering known as “Transitive Properties of Youth” by Lyonnais who just might be the last band in American to have a myspace page.

There is precious little on this release that doesn’t have me running for the stop button (or a knitting needle for my ears.)  It is the most inconsequential music I have ever had the misfortune of listening to. It has less musical value than a Cadbury Easter egg and about the same nutritional value.

On their myspace page they claim to be psychedelic. Even the most psychedelic band I have ever heard had a point – they had something to say – even if they were spacey and nebulous with the way they said it.

This is just droning – poorly produced tripe that I had to endure for hour after hour as I listened on a variety of days to assure myself it wasn’t my mood that was making me have such a negative reaction to the music.  Then I realized they were the reason that my mood always went sour after listening to them for more than three songs. (Thing is – you can’t really tell when one song ends and the next one begins.)

Being a music writer is usually the greatest job a guy can have. It is typically a pleasure – until you meet Lyonnais and “Transitive Properties of Youth” at which point it becomes more tedious than being an accountant.

Stand Out Tracks
Whatever the last track is be cause that means we are done listening to this.

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  1. George says:

    It’s one thing to tear a band apart, but to exclaim there is no point to the music and not elaborate on any sort of point is ridiculous, especially when your writing is overflowing with typos and errors. Don’t get me wrong, I respect your right to have an opinion and to express said opinion, but I think the way you chose to elaborate it displays the maturity and writing ability of an 8-year-old.

  2. Paul Barile says:


    I responded to you off channel, but a I look at this now – I am curious about the overflowing typos and errors. There are some kerning issues in the second graph, but I am not seeing overflows of typos or errors. Please elaborate.

  3. Paul- I actually read the review minus the “Stand Out Tracks” part. I just assumed it was actually a song on the album…you make me laugh!

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