Twelve Musical Christmas Wishes
12. I wish that someone would tell Justin Bieber that he is too young to have a “beard.”
11. I wish someone would string my guitar. (The last time I put new strings on Kurt Cobain was still alive).
10. I wish Beyonce/JLo would return my calls and have those court orders… ooops.
9. I wish Motown would rebuild the snakepit and start making relevant music again.
8. I wish Jessie J. would explain those two puppets in the intro to the “Price Tag” video.
7. I wish Pitbull and T-Pain would be my wingmen for a night.
6. I wish that every day I was shufflin’.
5. I wish Paul McCartney would get a facelift. The ex-Beatle looks like an old woman.
4. I wish Billy Corgan would get dropkicked by his fans in music and in pro wrestling.
3. I wish for two 2012 shows; Tim Minchin and The Ukulele Orchestra of Great Britain.
2. I wish to sign a songwriter’s agreement – at least get some love for my lyrics.
1. I wish Elvis was still alive and all the impersonators were dead
